Get a Life Q&A Feb 16 2014

I’ve just been appointed to act as consultant to a large firm. On the one hand I’m thrilled and excited, and on the other, I’m in disbelief. I can only remember hardship in my life and now it seems that I got this job without much struggle at all. What if something goes wrong? What if someone made a mistake?

And what if someone didn’t? What if someone did their job thoroughly and selected the best candidate? Take a moment to acknowledge yourself for this win. You got the job. Congratulations!

Now let’s look at what you believe about success. It sounds like your success has come with struggle. What have you made your struggles mean about you? How do you see yourself? What’s the condition of your self – worth right about now, given that you doubt you’ve actually earned this appointment?

And maybe you need to look at what part of you is resisting success and money flowing in? What are your beliefs about successful people, especially those keeping you from enjoying the abundance that life wants to show you?

You know what the law of attraction says, don’t you? We attract what we ARE, not what we do. That means we cannot retain what we’re not, we will get back to the system we know rather than what’s best for us. Think about someone who’s working to lose weight. They might drop a few kilos. The moment they revert to their regular routines and get back in the groove of life as usual, back comes the weight!

Success is an inside – out job! Believe you’re good. Believe it with every fibre of your being. There are no mistakes in life, only lessons.

I work with two very difficult people in the office. I truly believe they are there to test what I’m made of. One of them is a love – hate relationship. She loves to hate me and show it. The other one wants to bend the rules and I’m torn between wanting to keep our friendship and having to tell her I might fire her. How do I survive this?

Rule #1: Other people’s behavior is about them, not about you.
Rule #2: Everyone is acting to the best of their ability, given what they know at
that time.
Rule #3: You have choice over your behavior.

Now that I’ve said this, what do you realize? Notice how it’s like a cycle when we go unconscious, how easy it is to just react to the given situation without thinking we have power?

When we believe we are weak, we behave like people are doing things “to” us. We become like victims of circumstance, swept away by the tide, as if without strength. This girl who loves to show how she hates you. She’s probably an unhappy person who can’t see clearly because she’s in pain. She doesn’t understand that she’s actually only hurting herself when she’s mean. Soon she will find herself isolated and alone. Feel sorry for her.

The other one who wants to bend the rules… is taking you for granted. She doesn’t respect you, her job, or herself, because if she did, she would care for her credibility, her trustworthiness. You’d be supporting her by showing her boundaries.

Do you see yourself a leader? Leaders have it a tad more challenging than followers. Leaders play the role of bringing vision and managing change. Leaders work to bring solutions. Leaders are healers. How would we heal if we were so concerned about making everyone happy?

The way to survive is to live in your truth. Be driven by your commitment, your values, and what you want to leave as your legacy.


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